Kids and dogs: tips for unproblematic friendship

There’s a reason the image of a child and their dog is such an enduring one. When the relationship is nurtured well, it is genuinely one of the most rewarding bonds in family life — teaching children empathy, responsibility, and unconditional affection. But that relationship does not manage itself. Both children and dogs need guidance, boundaries, and supervision, particularly in the early stages.

Teach Children to Read Dog Body Language

Before a child and dog interact, the child needs to know how to read the dog. Most dog bites to children happen not because the dog is vicious but because the child missed clear warning signals. Dogs communicate almost entirely through body language, and teaching children even the basics can be genuinely life-saving.

Signs that a dog wants space:

• Turning their head away or refusing to make eye contact
• Yawning when not tired
• Licking their lips repeatedly
• Moving away from the child
• Stiff body posture or a very still, fixed position
• Tail held low or clamped
• Growling — this is communication, not aggression, and must not be punished

Teach children that a wagging tail does not always mean a dog is happy — it means the dog is emotionally aroused, which can be excitement or anxiety. The rest of the body tells the full story.

Ground Rules Every Child Should Know

Children need simple, memorable rules that they can apply consistently. Complex explanations are less useful than short, clear instructions that can be recalled in the moment.

• Always ask the owner before approaching any dog, including ones you know
• If a dog is eating, sleeping, or with puppies, leave it alone
• Never run towards or away from a dog — it triggers chase instinct
• No hugging around the neck — it feels threatening to most dogs
• Keep voices calm around dogs; screaming and shrieking can trigger arousal
• If a dog jumps up or acts too boisterous, fold arms and turn away — no eye contact, no pushing

Supervision: What It Actually Means

Supervision does not mean glancing up occasionally from the sofa. Around children, particularly young children or toddlers, active supervision means being close enough to intervene immediately. No dog — no matter how tolerant — should be left alone with a child under the age of ten without an adult present and engaged.

When supervision is not possible, separate the dog from the children using baby gates, a crate, or a closed door. This is not punishment for the dog; it is a sensible management strategy that protects both parties from a situation neither can navigate safely without adult oversight.

Introducing a Dog to a New Baby or Toddler

A new baby changes the household dynamic significantly, and dogs feel this shift. Preparation before the baby arrives reduces the likelihood of problems after. Start by adjusting your dog’s routine incrementally before the baby comes — if walks and feeding times will change, make those changes gradually in advance so they are not associated with the arrival.

In the days before bringing your baby home, bring a piece of clothing with the baby’s scent home first so your dog can investigate it calmly. When you arrive home, greet your dog normally before introducing them to the baby — a calm, structured first meeting sets a better foundation than one charged with your own anxiety. Let the dog sniff at a distance, reward calm behaviour, and do not force closeness.

For toddlers already in the home when a dog arrives, the same principle applies in reverse: give the dog a safe retreat from the toddler and teach the toddler to leave that space alone. Dogs need to be able to escape; a dog that cannot escape is far more likely to escalate to a bite.

What to Do If a Dog Growls or Bites a Child

A dog that growls at a child is communicating that it has reached its limit. The appropriate response is not to punish the growl — doing so removes a warning signal and increases the risk of a bite without warning in future. Instead, calmly separate the dog and child immediately, identify what triggered the response, and seek professional assessment.

If a bite occurs, the immediate priority is the child’s welfare: clean the wound thoroughly, seek medical attention (dog bites carry infection risk), and report the bite if required — in England and Wales, dog owners can face prosecution under the Dangerous Dogs Act if their dog injures someone. Do not delay seeking medical attention even for seemingly minor bites.

After any bite, do not make a rushed decision about the dog while emotions are running high. A full behavioural assessment by a qualified professional is important before deciding on next steps. Bites are almost always predictable and preventable in retrospect — understanding the trigger is key to preventing recurrence.

How Children Should Approach Dogs — Including Strangers’ Dogs

Many children are taught to love dogs but not how to approach them safely. The gap between enthusiasm and technique can be dangerous. Teach children the following sequence for approaching any dog:

The Stay-Step-Separate method:

• Stay: Stop still at a distance and ask the owner “Is it okay to say hello to your dog?”
• Step: If the owner says yes, step forward slowly and let the dog sniff a closed fist held low — do not thrust the hand forward
• Separate: If the dog turns away, sniffs briefly and moves off, or shows any stress signal, respect that and step back

Teach children never to approach a dog that is tethered or behind a barrier (such as in a car or behind a fence). Dogs in these situations cannot retreat, which significantly increases bite risk even in ordinarily friendly dogs. And remind them: even the friendliest dog can be having a bad day.

Subtle Warning Signs Before a Dog Snaps

The signals that precede a snap or bite are almost always there — but they are subtle enough that adults miss them, let alone children. Teaching adults who supervise children around dogs to recognise these signs is one of the most effective bite prevention measures available.

Signs to watch for immediately before escalation:

• Whale eye — the dog moves their eyes to look sideways without moving their head, showing the whites
• Stiff, statue-like body posture — a “freezing” dog is a dog considering its options
• Lip licking or yawning at an inappropriate moment (not tired, not just woken up)
• Hard stare — sustained, fixed eye contact directed at the child
• Hackles raised along the spine or shoulders
• Very low tail wagging — slow, stiff wag is very different from a broad, loose wag

If you see any of these signs, end the interaction immediately and calmly. Do not scold the dog. Separate, give the dog space, and reflect on what prompted the response. Dogs and children can get along, have fun, and inevitably become lifelong friends. In fact, when you think about it — the same applies to adults too!